2011 lo! =D

Passion vs Obligation.

Both get things done. One with enthusiaism and one with dread.

At least I'm sure now. It may be a mistake right from the start and I am not going to repeat it. It will be dumb of me to do so.

Oh wells, no regrets but I'm disappointed instead.

Many ups and downs in 2010. May 2011 be a better one! =)

ASS-U-ME

I don't like it when people assume that they know me very well. In fact, it irks me a lot when people 'act smart', self-believing that they know what am I thinking/feeling. Act like they know it all when in fact they know nothing at all.

I hate it even more when people speak to me in an accusing tone. It's irritating when people jump to conclusions and judge you based on that. They think that everything about them is right so when there's a problem, it's you. Self-conceited imbecile nincompoop.

HAPPY ME!!!!

End of exams never felt so good. I've been so super duper duper ultra-ly happy for the past few days, enjoying life ttm!

Let's see. After the two very depressing paper on the 20th, I met with Mel, Sheryl and CL in town and we did some shopping + a very satisfying rotary steamboat buffet in Taka. Spammed cheese tofu and sliced pork! Omg so shiok I LOVE SLICED PORK!! Went home, showered, hop into Daddy's car, and wheee, back to CL's place for a stayover! Ah Chua came over too and we did the usuals. HTHT, play games, eat supper, and basically just lepak and nuaaa..

21st: Hahahaha lousy. Slept till 5 or 6pm I can't remember. Haha changed, had dinner with Daddy and Mummy (hiak hiak I get all the love since bro&sis aren't there!) then went down to town to meet Raphael and Eileen. Attempted to shop but didn't have much time. LOL our meeting time was 8pm but all three of us were terribly late. Hehe

22nd: JiJi x'mas celebration! Yeeharr! Went out of the house early so I could shop for Baba's present. Took me a long long time and before getting her a shirt in the end. Nice bright yellow I like! Sidetrack a bit: recently I'm crazily in love with colourful things! Previously I kept buying long-sleeved clothes (idk why too) and now I'm addicted to colours. So pretty and it makes me happy! Okay so back to the celebration. Had korean bbq for dinner @ Far East and we did our exchange. Got masks from DJJ! Hahaha can add on to the collection in the hall fridge hehe! Walked around, snapped super a lot of photos and met many random friends. Saw Cheryl, Ah Chua and Edward! =D!

23rd: Chehhh. Sis told me to reserve this date for her and I did. But in the end we didn't go out. Tsktsk! I played MJ though! Went over to Ernie's and sad to say, I lost money =((

24th: X'mas eve!! Hahahaha two poor souls without boyfriends by their side (that's DJJ and me lah) decided to meet up on this day so we need not nua at home and feel even more sad about our relationship status. LOL! Rented a few DVDs, went to Suntec and caught "Love Storey" (Turbo's church play and it's really good!), went to town, did our mini countdown by the road, went to my place, and we had a movie marathon. "Taken" was one of them and it's super good!! =D

25th: Sad or not? I went over to T.Payoh to teach tuition on Christmas leh! Anyway what made me very excited for the whole day was the party going on at Mel's in the evening. Christmas was obviously the theme so we ate, drank, gambled, talked, played, exchanged, eat again, took photos, eat again, nua around, eat again, clear up a bit, eat again. HAHAHAHAH you get the idea. Keep eating omggggg. I swear I have a humongous appetite already but no way we can finish that amount of food! Nonetheless, thank you our dear Melissa for organizing this party. Bu kui shi weifare rep!! Without her, we wouldn't have so many S27 gatherings up till date. Even though it wasn't full attendance, it was still great company! =D!

26th: Wa seh. That's like, yesterday? Hahaha! But I can't remember what I did!

27th: Crazy imba shopping with DJJ! Nothing much to describe for today because all we did was really just shopping. Total amount was $281.39. FML there goes the tuition fee that AuntMich just transferred to my account. Internal MJ session just now didn't help as well. Today is just not a day to keep money by my side! =(

Such a wordy post. Shall dig up a few photos from FB to make this place more vibrant. Hahaha reminds me of Expose theme. Viva La Vibrante!

Anyway this reminds me. Eric messaged me today, asking me when I'm free to embark on our F&E'11 Euro trip. Sad to say, I can't make it!! After exams in May, I'll be busy with X-Phy. After X-Phy, there's NVM. After NVM, there's sports camp and Idk what else coming in. I'm really disappointed that I can't join him. We've been planning this for so long and I really do want to tour Europe! It's pretty amazing that my parents do allow me to go too. BIG FAT SIGH =( Oh yar, Eric doesn't want to postpone it to year-end as well because he said he had enough of the cold. Lucky ass just came back from Korea while I'm stuck in this tropical minute island. T.T

Okay sad things aside. Pictures!


<3 x'mas!



<3 x'mas X2!!


<3 x'mas X3!!!

Last teen year ALREADY?!

Hello people! I AM 19 YEARS OLD NOW!

When I was young, I always felt that university students are all big gorgors and jiejies but now that I'm in a uni myself, I don't feel grown up at all! Really! They call it the Peter Pan syndrome. I don't want to grow up. I like acting like a small kid, doing countless of childish acts. I'm happy that way.

So yes, back to my birthday. I'm not exactly a big fan of birthdays because I'm damn lazy to celebrate them. It comes every year and it's just another ordinary day! Moreover there are a billion people out there sharing the same birthday as you so it doesn't make it such a special day after all. Buuuuuuut, I must say that I had a pretty awesome one this year and that led me to this conclusion! What's important about a birthday is NOT the celebration, but the people who are around you at that time. The people who remembered, the people who bothered, and the people who actually do care.

See. The fact that I don't really care about my own birthday but they actually do makes me feels so touched. I hope I phrased it correctly. I'm not saying that I don't appreciate their effort. In fact I do, and very much too!!

On this special day (okay the day passed alr but let's just treat it as it hasn't), I would like to thank my parents for bring me to Earth. They have been wonderful parents, taking care and guiding me throughout all these years and I definitely wouldn't be who I am without them. They taught me moral values, taught me manners and gave me room to grow/develop. Time and time again I made them disappointed, but time and time again they made me feel the love. I am very thankful to have them as my beloved Daddy and Mummy. I will be a filial daughter I promise. =)

I would like to thank my friends too! Okay my dearest rommie Caryn Chua Hui Ying (I know you'll be reading this!). Thanks for celebrating my birthday with me, and getting so many people to do it with you too. I really awww-ed and wanted to cry when I saw the card you wrote. So nice of you, I love you too! Thanks for all the effort. You very busy huh. Celebrate as a roomie, celebrate as Honeydew Sistas, then we're gonna celebrate again with Jiji. Hehe. 爱死你了!

Then we have Melissa! You have been an awesome friend to me (just like how I have been an awesome friend to you too HAHAHAHA)! Thanks a lot for putting in the effort too. I have pasted up the many birthday notes you wrote for me! Pop by one day I can prove to you that it is indeed there. I must say that your art has improved a lot. Left-handers are indeed talented in art huh! Heh, I'll see ya again on Monday let's go Chomp Chomp eat!!! =D!

Hmm since this is a private-yet-not-really-that-private blog so I wouldn't know who's reading. If you're a friend of mine and you did wish me a happy birthday, thank you! If you're a friend of mine and you haven't done so, upalasial what you waiting for? HAHAHA okay kidding!

So yeaps, I'm gonna end this blog post soon so I can go watch The Mentalist. I FOUND IT ONLINE HOW AWESOME IS THAT!!! Hehe before I go, I want to say it again that I am very happy on the day of my birthday. Thank you family, friends, relatives and the waiter at Marche (HAHA!). I felt so much love I think my heart melted. Give you a virtual kiss muackx muackx!

I hate school.

I'm real depressed now.

Had a bad paper in the day, 3 more to come in the next 5 days.

I'm sick of school, sick of studying.

Freaking pekcek. Grouchy and I just want to throw a tantrum.

Stupid Exams Can You Please Leave Me Alone. Me No Likey You! =(

Studying is making me sad.

I don't remember feeling so moody while studying. Maybe it's because non-NTU students are out there enjoying this festive season while the rest of us are back here mugging our ass off just to get a decent grade.

Shit, I don't remember spending so much time studying. For the past few weeks, my top priority is studies. Been slacking wayyyyyy to much and when many others have already completed past year papers, I'm still working on the tutorials FOR THE FIRST TIME.

A'levels wasn't even this bad. I wasn't this pekcek back then. I remember fooling around with BFF, procrastinating, going around school for the mystery hole at the girl's toilet with CJ+Serene+SiYuan and gang, waiting for 7pm to come so there's free beehoon and milo, sitting at the bus-stop with Steven. Sure, we were worried but definitely not stressed. For me at least. But this time, freaking hell I feel so 绝望 and pissed off that exams are here, at this timing!!

What is this. I have no mood to study. I'm too angsty. WHERE IS MY SNOW STORM!!!

So angry, so irritated, so pissed, so pekcek, so siannnnn.

EXAMS BEGONE!!!

WALAO SINCE WHEN I WILL WORRY ABOUT EXAMS ONE!!! Not trying to be arrogant or what but seriouslyyyyy, last time like anyhow anyhow also can get a decent grade one lei. But now?! TMD FML like seriously.

Okay I'm finding it amusing how come I'm so angsty in this post.

Summarize: EXAMS YOU CAN JUST GO AND DIE OKAY. GO AND DIE. GO GO GO!!!

Rapunzellll~

Today is a good day!!

I need some life like seriously. Everyday is just wake up, shower, pack my things, go SAC/ OCA to study, have dinner, continue studying, have supper, get back to hall, wash up, sleep, and the cycle repeats itself.

Buuuuut, today is different!!!

Went out to JP and caught Rapunzel with Eileen. Awww I love Disney movies!! Well, most of them at least. We need such lovely endings to keep us all optimistic when facing reality. Moreover I think Rapunzel is really pretty! Hahah big eyes and holy-mama slim waist. Kind of scary if she's a real-life being though. So skinny!!!

Okay maybe I'm really too deprived but seeing those x'mas decorations in JP today is enough to make me feel very very contented. We even heard x'mas carols!! Hahahaha sounds stupid but seriouslyyyyy, ntu where got x'mas carols one.

I know I should be studying, but I NEED A LIFE. Daddy is coming over tml night to bring me out for dinner. Wasn't very keen on going but since he asked, I felt that I should go. Next thurs I'll be going out of school to have dinner too. Once again I feel that I should study but yet again I was persuaded into attending. Then next Sat I'll be going clubbing (SERIOUSLY WHAT IS THIS!!) but hard to resist! 98.7FM having their 21st b'day party @ Velvet Underground, then both me and Eileen we won 4 passes each! Free flow drinks plus lucky draw leh!

Okay I promise I'll study damn hard. Been slacking way way too much for the previous 13 weeks! After talking to Farrell, I have a new goal now! Hhahaha aim for exchange! I think that's reasonable enough! =D

Count On Me

Love the lyrics! Try listening to this song if you have not heard it before.

Count On Me -- Bruno Mars



"If you ever find yourself stuck in the middle of the sea,
I'll sail the world to find you
If you ever find yourself lost in the dark and you can't see,
I'll be the light to guide you

Find out what we're made of
When we are called to help our friends in need

You can count on me like 1 2 3
I'll be there
And I know when I need it I can count on you like 4 3 2
And you'll be there
Cause that's what friends are supposed to do, oh yeah

Wooooh, Wooooh
yeah Yeah

If you toss and you turn and you just can't fall asleep
I'll sing a song
beside you
And if you ever forget how much you really mean to me
Everyday I will
remind you

Ohh
Find out what we're made of
When we are called to help our friends in need

You can count on me like 1 2 3
I'll be there
And I know when I need it I can count on you like 4 3 2
You'll be there
Cause that's what friends are supposed to do, oh yeah

Wooooh, Wooooh
Yeah Yeah

You'll always have my shoulder when you cry
I'll never let go
Never say goodbye

You can count on me like 1 2 3
I'll be there
And I know when I need it I can count on you like 4 3 2
You'll be there
Cause that's what friends are supposed to do, oh yeah

Wooooh, Wooooh
you can count on me cos' I can count on you"

If someone pops into your head while you're listening. That person must have been a great friend to you. Let him/her know! =)

You don't know, so don't act like you do.

I woke up at 1.45am, fully awake, sat up in bed, laid against the wall, place my knees close to me, and I stone. It was a tranquil moment, sitting in that position and just let my thoughts wander. Maybe it's because of the timing, maybe it's because I'm alone, or maybe it's just the atmosphere in the room at that point. All I could hear is the clock ticking and the fan spinning above. All these felt oddly comfortable, but then I sighed.

Am I happy?

I hope so.

Who I am in the presence of others VS Who I am when I am alone. There's a difference. I wouldn't call I hypocrisy, nor will I label it as a facade. This is just the way it is. Either way, I am who I am and I like it this way. Be true to others, and be true to yourself.

Don't judge me after you've read this. You won't understand, and I'm not saying that you should. Take it with a pinch of salt. We all have times that we just need to be alone. Once again, don't judge.

This reminds me. Each time we know that a friend is feeling unhappy, we will show our concern, asking him/her if she is alright and letting them know that we will be there when he/she does need us. However, how many times do we actually mean what we say? For me, I really do mean it if I ever told you that you can talk to me if you need someone for support. However, when I think about it, I realise that there's actually nothing much I can do for that friend if he/she comes to me. The max I can promise is to be a good audience. I'll listen, but when it comes to good advices, I'm sorry, I am unable to give you any.

Nor can I say things that are consoling. To me, no matter how sincere those words are, they will end up being impractical when it comes out of my mouth. It's like patting the shoulder of someone and saying "Things will get better". What makes you so sure that they will? What if they don't? What if that person believed in you but in the end, things still end up being screwed up? Can you be accountable for the false hopes you've given? Life is not a fairytale. We don't get happily ever after endings all the time.

Buuuuut, I still need people to give me that glimpse of hope. Albeit sugarcoated, listening to it a few more times will somehow make me feel that it's real. We live in a world that somehow needs us to lie to ourselves, intentionally indulging in the attitude of escapism.

"I hope so" doesn't mean that I'm not. Like what I've said, don't judge when you don't understand.

Absolutes are never true. Spot the irony.

Hahaha okay I'm happy now. I see some hope already! =DD

Okay happy updates right. Hmms, I met up with Eric on Tues to watch HP7 together. Been super long since I last went to town (+2 for happiness), been a while since I last met up with Eric (+3 for happiness), been some time since I last watched a good movie (+2 for happiness), been super duper long since I've last shopped (+2 for happiness), been mega mega long ago since I took such a long bus ride (+1 for happiness). Oh yar, I ate my lovely bento set from Sakae for lunch (+3 for happiness) when Biz Law lecture was cancelled (+8 for happiness). =D

AA101 quizzy tomorrow and upon knowing that it's all MCQs, my motivation to study for it dropped down to ground zero. I'm happily rewatching my drama now whatisthis. Oh yarrr, Mel is coming over in a short while to deliver supper! Egg tart and donuts whee-you-whee! Today is a super good day! I got locked out of my room because I left my key inside but hengggggg ttm I saw Chris at CantA so he lent me the key to his room. Yayy so I squatted over there for a few hours and he even bought Macs for me. Hao leh. Okay I'm just rambling now but it's okay!

22nd Dec is JIJI X'mas party yaww! So exciting, gift exchange again! =D

Xie Xie Ni Men =)

I am very lucky to have such nice friends. So kind, so sweet and being so concerned about me. Thank you all, really.

Give me some time, I'll solve my issues on hand then post a happy entry for all to read. =)

Face it.

When I've screwed up something real bad, I need people to tell me that things will be fine and it's never too late to salvage the situation. I know that I've made a mistake, and it really really won't help at all if someone were to start scolding me, pointing out my faults and criticizing what I've done. When I'm feeling lousy enough, bombarding me with questions I have no answers to will only make it worse. Believe me, I do know what went wrong with myself and if I could, I will definitely not repeat the same mistakes again. Let me know that you are supporting me. Let me know that it's not over. I will put in my best efforts such that I won't disappoint again. It may sound very kiddish, but I do need people to speak to me kindly.

/edit Mel is a stalker. HAHAHAH I posted this for less than 3 mins and she msged me already, showing lots of concern for me. So sweet leh! Anyway she also commented and I sounded angry in this post. Where got? Hahaha in fact I'm very thankful can. Heh =D

14 hours a day?!

Click Here!

Read about this man and I think it's time to feel inferior. HAHA!

Street Challenge!

Street Challenge is over! 20th comm first event and I feel that it ended up pretty well! Hehe it feels like a roller coaster ride. Those kind whereby you'll complain "what the hell why I am I doing this to myself" at the beginning but when it's all over, you go "Omg so fun I want to do it again!" =D

Anyway I was damn shagged after the whole thing. Was in a cranky state and the fact that I haven't showered for super long made me very pek cek. I fell asleep while drinking ice Milo and fell asleep while shitting too. When I was showering, I felt prickly all over and as usual, I ended up having cuts all over without knowing how they ended up there. Many blue-blacks appeared today as well and lastly, my worst case of sunburn ever. It is so bad I have to sleep by lying in my stomach. Can't risk bua-ing against the bedsheets cuz it friggin hurts like mad. Can cry TT.TT

Still, I'm glad that Str Chal is over! Hehe I also want to thank Mel, Serene, PohGek, SekHui and WanFong for coming down. Hahaha I literally forced them to form a team and honestly speaking they don't really know each other yet they're playing a team sport and sad to say, didn't win. Ohno must be because I didn't play la LOL (ahahaha Mel this is for you to see!).

Okay it's time to sleep. Going back to school tml morning and good thing Daddy will be sending me there! He lent me his spare phone too. Damn sian my screen just died on me during Str Chal and I believe it's because if the scorching sun. Even the stopwatch died on me can. So yea, my laopok phone can only be used for calling. Quite cool eh. The screen is just black but I can still agar agar unlock the phone, key in phone numbers (that I can remember), press the call button, and it connects!

Bad Head Day

Headache, headache, go away.

I could feel it coming, hence I took a nap.

Woke up feeling worse, but still, I believe it will subside soon.

Now, it's so bad I feel like puking.

I shudder, have goosebumps, and I sigh.

Don't Work

"I must say thank you to the faculty and staff of the Wee Kim Wee
School of Communication and Information for inviting me to give your
convocation address. It’s a wonderful honor and a privilege for me to
speak here for ten minutes without fear of contradiction, defamation
or retaliation. I say this as a Singaporean and more so as a husband.

My wife is a wonderful person and perfect in every way except one. She
is the editor of a magazine. She corrects people for a living. She has
honed her expert skills over a quarter of a century, mostly by
practising at home during conversations between her and me.

On the other hand, I am a litigator. Essentially, I spend my day
telling people how wrong they are. I make my living being
disagreeable.

Nevertheless, there is perfect harmony in our matrimonial home. That
is because when an editor and a litigator have an argument, the one
who triumphs is always the wife.

And so I want to start by giving one piece of advice to the men: when
you’ve already won her heart, you don’t need to win every argument.

Marriage is considered one milestone of life. Some of you may already
be married. Some of you may never be married. Some of you will be
married. Some of you will enjoy the experience so much, you will be
married many, many times. Good for you.

The next big milestone in your life is today: your graduation. The end
of education. You’re done learning.

You’ve probably been told the big lie that “Learning is a lifelong
process” and that therefore you will continue studying and taking
masters’ degrees and doctorates and professorships and so on. You know
the sort of people who tell you that? Teachers. Don’t you think there
is some measure of conflict of interest? They are in the business of
learning, after all. Where would they be without you? They need you to
be repeat customers.

The good news is that they’re wrong.

The bad news is that you don’t need further education because your
entire life is over. It is gone. That may come as a shock to some of
you. You’re in your teens or early twenties. People may tell you that
you will live to be 70, 80, 90 years old. That is your life
expectancy.

I love that term: life expectancy. We all understand the term to mean
the average life span of a group of people. But I’m here to talk about
a bigger idea, which is what you expect from your life.

You may be very happy to know that Singapore is currently ranked as
the country with the third highest life expectancy. We are behind
Andorra and Japan, and tied with San Marino. It seems quite clear why
people in those countries, and ours, live so long. We share one thing
in common: our football teams are all hopeless. There’s very little
danger of any of our citizens having their pulses raised by watching
us play in the World Cup. Spectators are more likely to be lulled into
a gentle and restful nap.

Singaporeans have a life expectancy of 81.8 years. Singapore men live
to an average of 79.21 years, while Singapore women live more than
five years longer, probably to take into account the additional time
they need to spend in the bathroom.

So here you are, in your twenties, thinking that you’ll have another
40 years to go. Four decades in which to live long and prosper.

Bad news. Read the papers. There are people dropping dead when they’re
50, 40, 30 years old. Or quite possibly just after finishing their
convocation. They would be very disappointed that they didn’t meet
their life expectancy.

I’m here to tell you this. Forget about your life expectancy.

After all, it’s calculated based on an average. And you never, ever
want to expect being average.

Revisit those expectations. You might be looking forward to working,
falling in love, marrying, raising a family. You are told that, as
graduates, you should expect to find a job paying so much, where your
hours are so much, where your responsibilities are so much.

That is what is expected of you. And if you live up to it, it will be
an awful waste.

If you expect that, you will be limiting yourself. You will be living
your life according to boundaries set by average people. I have
nothing against average people. But no one should aspire to be them.
And you don’t need years of education by the best minds in Singapore
to prepare you to be average.

What you should prepare for is mess. Life’s a mess. You are not
entitled to expect anything from it. Life is not fair. Everything does
not balance out in the end. Life happens, and you have no control over
it. Good and bad things happen to you day by day, hour by hour, moment
by moment. Your degree is a poor armour against fate.

Don’t expect anything. Erase all life expectancies. Just live. Your
life is over as of today. At this point in time, you have grown as
tall as you will ever be, you are physically the fittest you will ever
be in your entire life and you are probably looking the best that you
will ever look. This is as good as it gets. It is all downhill from
here. Or up. No one knows.

What does this mean for you? It is good that your life is over.

Since your life is over, you are free. Let me tell you the many
wonderful things that you can do when you are free.

The most important is this: do not work.

Work is anything that you are compelled to do. By its very nature, it
is undesirable.

Work kills. The Japanese have a term “Karoshi”, which means death from
overwork. That’s the most dramatic form of how work can kill. But it
can also kill you in more subtle ways. If you work, then day by day,
bit by bit, your soul is chipped away, disintegrating until there’s
nothing left. A rock has been ground into sand and dust.

There’s a common misconception that work is necessary. You will meet
people working at miserable jobs. They tell you they are “making a
living”. No, they’re not. They’re dying, frittering away their
fast-extinguishing lives doing things which are, at best, meaningless
and, at worst, harmful.

People will tell you that work ennobles you, that work lends you a
certain dignity. Work makes you free. The slogan “Arbeit macht frei”
was placed at the entrances to a number of Nazi concentration camps.
Utter nonsense.

Do not waste the vast majority of your life doing something you hate
so that you can spend the small remainder sliver of your life in
modest comfort. You may never reach that end anyway.

Resist the temptation to get a job. Instead, play. Find something you
enjoy doing. Do it. Over and over again. You will become good at it
for two reasons: you like it, and you do it often. Soon, that will
have value in itself.

I like arguing, and I love language. So, I became a litigator. I enjoy
it and I would do it for free. If I didn’t do that, I would’ve been in
some other type of work that still involved writing fiction – probably
a sports journalist.

So what should you do? You will find your own niche. I don’t imagine
you will need to look very hard. By this time in your life, you will
have a very good idea of what you will want to do. In fact, I’ll go
further and say the ideal situation would be that you will not be able
to stop yourself pursuing your passions. By this time you should know
what your obsessions are. If you enjoy showing off your knowledge and
feeling superior, you might become a teacher.

Find that pursuit that will energise you, consume you, become an
obsession. Each day, you must rise with a restless enthusiasm. If you
don’t, you are working.

Most of you will end up in activities which involve communication. To
those of you I have a second message: be wary of the truth. I’m not
asking you to speak it, or write it, for there are times when it is
dangerous or impossible to do those things. The truth has a great
capacity to offend and injure, and you will find that the closer you
are to someone, the more care you must take to disguise or even
conceal the truth. Often, there is great virtue in being evasive, or
equivocating. There is also great skill. Any child can blurt out the
truth, without thought to the consequences. It takes great maturity to
appreciate the value of silence.

In order to be wary of the truth, you must first know it. That
requires great frankness to yourself. Never fool the person in the
mirror.

I have told you that your life is over, that you should not work, and
that you should avoid telling the truth. I now say this to you: be
hated.

It’s not as easy as it sounds. Do you know anyone who hates you? Yet
every great figure who has contributed to the human race has been
hated, not just by one person, but often by a great many. That hatred
is so strong it has caused those great figures to be shunned, abused,
murdered and in one famous instance, nailed to a cross.

One does not have to be evil to be hated. In fact, it’s often the case
that one is hated precisely because one is trying to do right by one’s
own convictions. It is far too easy to be liked, one merely has to be
accommodating and hold no strong convictions. Then one will gravitate
towards the centre and settle into the average. That cannot be your
role. There are a great many bad people in the world, and if you are
not offending them, you must be bad yourself. Popularity is a sure
sign that you are doing something wrong.

The other side of the coin is this: fall in love.

I didn’t say “be loved”. That requires too much compromise. If one
changes one’s looks, personality and values, one can be loved by
anyone.

Rather, I exhort you to love another human being. It may seem odd for
me to tell you this. You may expect it to happen naturally, without
deliberation. That is false. Modern society is anti-love. We’ve taken
a microscope to everyone to bring out their flaws and shortcomings. It
far easier to find a reason not to love someone, than otherwise.
Rejection requires only one reason. Love requires complete acceptance.
It is hard work – the only kind of work that I find palatable.

Loving someone has great benefits. There is admiration, learning,
attraction and something which, for the want of a better word, we call
happiness. In loving someone, we become inspired to better ourselves
in every way. We learn the truth worthlessness of material things. We
celebrate being human. Loving is good for the soul.

Loving someone is therefore very important, and it is also important
to choose the right person. Despite popular culture, love doesn’t
happen by chance, at first sight, across a crowded dance floor. It
grows slowly, sinking roots first before branching and blossoming. It
is not a silly weed, but a mighty tree that weathers every storm.
You will find, that when you have someone to love, that the face is
less important than the brain, and the body is less important than the
heart.

You will also find that it is no great tragedy if your love is not
reciprocated. You are not doing it to be loved back. Its value is to
inspire you.

Finally, you will find that there is no half-measure when it comes to
loving someone. You either don’t, or you do with every cell in your
body, completely and utterly, without reservation or apology. It
consumes you, and you are reborn, all the better for it.

Don’t work. Avoid telling the truth. Be hated. Love someone."

-Written by Adrian Tan, author of The Teenage Textbook (1988), was the
guest-of-honour at a recent NTU convocation ceremony. This was his
speech to the graduating class of 2008.

A friend showed me this, and I thought I should share it with more people! How many of us actually dare to step out of the mold we're we used to and actually not work but play instead?

I got back to hall at 4.30AM this morning. Meeting lasted since 7.30PM the night before. I was so braindead I think I fell asleep before my head even came in contact with the pillow. I was determined to wake up at 7.30AM for Biz Law tutorial but I swear I didn't even hear the alarm ring.

Anyway, I want to get a new phone soon. I should really let my beloved lao pok Nokia retire though I can't bear to let it go. Don't underestimate it alright. He's real sturdy and really really served me well. Where can I find such a good phone ever again? =(

HTHT

I love it when friends share with me what are they thinking/feeling/experiencing. It makes me feel much closer to them, and it gives me the feeling that I am being trusted. To me, a good relationship (friends/lovers/family) really needs a lot of communication and letting the other party know about your life is a pretty good way. You share with them your joy, your sadness, basically everything because you know that they care and they want to know too.

I wish I can share my feelings with people comfortably too. I do voice out my thoughts, but thoughts aren't feelings. Sometimes I wish I could put aside the rational voice inside my head and portray what I truly feel inside my heart. I think the only time I really do share my feelings is when I'm in a state of breaking down. I sob, I whimper, I need someone for me to cling on too as I spill out my fears. I'm not afraid to say that I am vulnerable, because it is true. I dare not be sad because once I am, it is hard for me to get back on my feet. I crumble, I don't know what else to do besides crying. I feel all lost and worse of all, I push people away when they come to me, expecting them to come back but no, not all will understand that.

I don't know why am I saying all these now. Hahahah I'm not sad or anything. Just a random thought after having a talk with a friend a few days ago. To be honest, I'm surprised that so much was said, for we're not THAT close. Somehow I'm a little envious how some can share so much with another with ease. Oh wells, we're all different aren't we?

Okay I should get back to my notes. Accounting mid-terms tomorrow and I've just started on my revision. Sat was spent on IVP Track&Field and Sun was spent on Halloween Special: Ghost Whisper marathon. Ooops.

So sweet!!!

My dear is attached to Ruben now and they are so sweet together!! Zomgggg I'm gonna melt. HAHAHA looking at the way they interact really brings a smile to my face. HEHE I'm here staring at the monitor watching korean dramas and they are behind me, talking about I-don't-know-what-cuz-I-don't-eavesdrop. Could keep them laughing every now and then though. AWWWW. Yayyy I feel so happy for them. Sweet sweet love! Might be the n'th time I'm saying it but I really super love it when my friends get attached. Though it's none of my business but it's really so sweet to see them basking in happiness! =DDD!!

For you, if you think you need it

I believe that everybody is vulnerable in their own ways.

Don't stay strong if you can't.

Let yourself collapse; help is on the way.

Cry if you must, we're all human.

Sound out for help, for a sign of weakness shows that you're still alive.

You'll never walk alone.

Random

Been so long since I last came back here and I don't know what should I blog about.

Mummy misses me so I'll be going home on Friday.
Steven called me today and it's great to hear that all is fine over at Taiwan.
I'm falling ill soon. Been coughing and I'm desperately trying to stop it from getting worse.
Biz Law 2K words essay is due soon and I've not typed a single word yet.
I just found out 2 days ago that there's a FM quiz after recess week.
And I found out a few minutes ago that Accounting mid-terms is less than 2 weeks away.
I'm going for Nike City 10K Challenge and I hope I won't die.
I need to stop procrastinating like seriously.

Goodbye.

Hall life!

Blogging from hall!

I’ve been enjoying myself a lot these few days. Living in hall is definitely a whole new experience for me and I seriously hope that I can continue this good life when school starts. Haha of course it’s impossible but still, life’s really good right now! Happy me! =D

Updates!

Updates!

SU 17
Sports Camp has got to be the xiong-est camp I've ever been too. LTC and OBS is not even 1/2638489584643 comparable to it please. HAHAHA no joke! Land expedition at Ubin was non-stop running. Navigated wrongly, went one big round, ran till I went starry-eyed, ran till I decided to just keep my eyes half closed to save energy. Amazing race around Sg was around roung of non-stop running. Ran till my muscles were so tensed, ran till I was screaming in my head, ran till I could really just drop down to the ground. Second day of amazing race was yet another round of running. Ran till we went up the wrong bus, ran till we got yielded by our fellow sister group, ran till we decided to forget it and just walk. LOL. Very last day, had our finale and it was still running! Ran till I felt dizzy, ran till I couldn't see, ran till I hyperventilated in the end. Zzomgg so scary, thinking back I'm pretty amazed that I actually survived it all. Hahahaha my fitness is chui ttm kind! Now I really understand. MIND OVER BODY!

In any case, Sports Camp is definitely fun and superrrrr memorable. 为什么来 Sports Camp?!

Disney phuture!
Hahahahaha what a night. LOL drank too much, got too high, and now I can't really remember what happened. In any case, lesson learnt. I'm not a good drinker, so next time I shall be a good girl and just stay away from alcohol. HAHAH!

YOG site check!
Zzomgg I was so freaking shaggggggg. Slept for 1 hour or so only and I have to get off my bed and go meet DJJ. Oh wells, going down to the venue itself makes the whole YOG feeling more exciting! We were lucky that our venue is Singapore Indoor Stadium (SIS) too. It's air-conditioned and we get to watch the matches too! Ooo, sometimes we'll see the young athletes as well! =DD!

Wheezy outing!
Hahahahha our very first outing. Met up at Somerset, and I was the only one who was on time. The rest were all late! Anyway, we had lunch at Marche and it's funny to hear them say what happened on fri night. So many scandals going on sioll! Had to leave early, and I made my way to SIS!!

First YOG shift!
Oh no. I've typed a whole chunk then I remembered that we're not allowed to blog about YOG. Ouh man. Aiya people, go get the tickets! Hehe the matches are all very very exciting! You need to be there to experience it all! =DD!

Off for camp!

The pictures for council's gathering are out!

Those who were there =)

EspriCo! =D

So! I went to Marina Bay Sands on Friday because mummy got 3 complimentary nights for being some club member. Eric's mom got that too, and so did his grandmother. LOL all compulsive gamblers! Okay I shan't complain. Hehe we got 3 rooms in all and supposedly should only have 6 people going but we obviously just didn't care. Heh

Took me super long to get to MBS. Alighted at Promenade station and I have no idea how to pronounce that name. It looks oddly familiar. Like some fruit or what. HAHAHA! Kay kiang and attempted to get there by foot but I walked to the yog venue instead. That's what you get for blindly following the crowd and better still, my phone decided to die on me just when I was about to call someone for help. Thanks ahhh.

Managed to reach in the end, met up with Mummy (they don't allow me in without the key D: ) and tadah! Into the room! Okay apparently we didn't take any photos of the room, but I would say that it's not bad lah. Modern and equipped with 3 phones. HAHAHA, cordless somemore! Ohh! And their fridge is damn jian4. They equipped a sensor on it, so charges will apply once you take out any food item for more than 30 seconds. Woahhh. High tech siall! LOL! Their toilet door has no lock as well. It's like a wooden panel that you slide here and there. Mummy was so worried that I'll barge in when she's showering hahahahaha.

Went up to the sky garden and the water looks so tempting!

Infinity pool concept!



When you get there, everything is about having a card. You flash your card to go into the lifts. You flash you card to enter the sky garden. You flash your card again to go into the pool.



Was damn hungry by then so we had our dinner. Everything is just super overpriced. Ate zar cai fan and it costs $6.50! Crazyyyyy. LOL. Walked around and many of the shops are still closed. So, back to the pool when it's already night time!

The scenery at night is reallyyy prettyyyyyy!

=DDD!

=DDD!

Wanted to wait for fireworks since YOG is having their opening ceremony rehearsal but good thing we didn't since there weren't fireworks anyway. Back back down, showered, met up with JingFei and we made our way to Marina Square for Starbucks and Streetdance.



I think it was pretty good and that's what you usually get for dance movies. The face challenges, they try to overcome them, they go for competitions, they win/lose (no spoilers!) it. One thing distracting me a lot a lot is the accent of the female lead (Carly). It's the british accent I think, and it's really strong! It goes up and down then up and then back down. Super weirdddd.

Cabbed back, flop into bed, and I woke up just in time for check-out. LOL.

Met up with Ying and I got so lost again. In the end, I walked from MBS to Esplanade to Citylink to City Hall then finally trained to Bishan. KNS. THAT'S DAMN FAR AND THE WEATHER IS FREAKING HOT!

Did some shopping and we were on our way to town when I received a call from Sis, saying that she couldn't get into the house. Having not much of a choice, I cabbed back home to save her (when I was actually at Newton!) and she didn't return me the cab fares even though she promised to. Hmph. Nua-ed at home with Ying and DJJ joined us shortly after.

When it was about time, went all the way back to Marina Square for Sports Camp briefing. Siall lah, it was only pre-camp and they're all damn high already. HAHA! Later in the afternoon (3.30pm. Shiok right!), I'll be meeting them at Rail Mall and the camp starts officially!

7D6N, really hope that I can survive through it!

Why so busy?

Okay let’s rewind all the way back to 17th July!

17th: EspriCo dinner at D.Ghaut Sakura was changed to Heaven’s Loft at Orchard Central instead. Saw so many familiar faces you know! WeeLing, Serene, WeiCong, Jay + Ernest and XiMing. I think the last time I saw them proper was like, 5th March? Haha! It was the day we got our A’lvl results! So longgggggg. Anyway, it was great to see them again. Halfway through the dinner I was slowly looking each and every one of them properly, smiling to myself secretly. Hehe happy happy! After dinner we went to a very sleezy KTV place to have a karaoke session. Coolios they have ‘advertisements’ on the TV, letting you know the girls ‘available’ for the night to you know, accompany the guests. LOL. Took NR3 back and I was chatting with XM about his airborne experience. Coolios jump off a plane and parachute down! So fun I also want! Hahahaha.

18th: Nothing much. Went for tuition at Newton before meeting Eric for Inception at Lot1. I like Inception! Hahahaha felt that I could understand most of it but yea, the ending is indeed intriguing. Walked home with Eric and during the journey we were discussing about the movie non-stop. LOL figured that we might just go insane so we hurriedly went back and googled “Inception Discussion Forum” and I think it’s useful! Some of the posts really made sense and will really make one go “Woahhh”. Hahaha, just thought of something funny. In the middle of the night, I suddenly came up with the theory regarding the movie and I wanted to share it with Eric. Went into his room and whispered his name but he didn’t respond so I left. Suddenly, his door just opened again! Scare me you know. He then asked “Did you call my name just now?” Sial lah, he actually heard me but thought I was a ghost =.=

20th: Met up with Elaine and we went shopping! This was my first shopping session after coming back from Macau/Zhuhai! What a waste of the GSS season so we thought that it’s indeed time for us to go spend some money before it’s all over. Felt that I didn’t really bought a lot but I suppose it’s sufficient. We didn’t have much time to walk around anyway. Both of us scheduled tuition so after that, back to Newton again! Anyway, tuition was fun because we had it at the poolside where it was very windy. Towards the end, Tim (my tutee’s brother) joined us as well and threatened to throw Joy (hehe my cute tutee!) into the pool if she doesn’t pay attention. Hahaha it was a fake threat lah. Whether or not she pays attention, he is going to throw her in. It’s kinda sweet to see them play with each other. Mind you, the brother is 19 this year and my tutee is only 12. Imagine a supposedly mature young adult wrestling with a screamy and powerless young girl. Hahaha funny!

22th: Went swimming with Mummy in the morning and I want to say how much I’m in love with swimming. HAHA! I can get tanned and attempt to work on those fats without having to get all out of breath and sticky from perspiring = a good deal! It is also my feeble attempt to prepare myself for the upcoming Sports Camp. I’m scared lah! My fitness is at ground zero now. Walking around is enough to get me aching muscles and now it’s Sports Camp. SPORTS!! Zzomgg kill me please. Anyway, met up with DJJ at night for a second round of Inception! Felt that I could understand it better this time but still the same result, an ending that is really subjective.

23th: Settled applications for Uni! Everything was so foreign to me previously and I kept whining and procrastinating. Finally had them done! Went to OCBC to get the bank loan and I personally prefer OCBC over DBS. There was hardly any queue at OCBC! Go in, take a number, and it was my turn in less than 5mins. Anyway it was great to have Daddy doing it with me. Lost my acceptance letter so Daddy drove me to NTU to collect it (whoohoo and I conveniently submitted my Giro form) before going back to the bank again. So it’s all done now. 90% of fees via bank loan, 10% via CPF and miscellaneous fees through Giro. =D. Got a call from XiMing at night and he told me he was out on a gay date with WeiCong. LOL. Met up with them + Jay + TengWei + Michelle for Sorcerer’s Apprentice at Lot1. I was pretty excited about the movie but somehow it just wasn’t as nice as I thought. I think I’m rather picky when it comes to movie. SP is acceptable, but definitely not mind-blowing =)

24th: Met up with Leonard, Steven and RuiYong before making our way down to Aljunied to meet Serene and ZiJian. I’ve learnt my lesson. When meeting Leonard, just forget it and give up reaching on time because he will definitely be late. HAHA why like that? I’ve always thought that army boys will have a sense of urgency and good time management. Obviously I’m wrong. So, we bought our BBQ food at Aljunied (Crazy that’s imba-ly far pls!) and made our way back to JP and met up with a few others before going to HuiMin’s place. Yayyy, council gathering! Saw many familiar faces again! Happy happy. Hahaha helped out by cooking a little before receding to play MJ with Eric, WeiCong and Jay. MAHJONG! That’s something else I’ve not been doing for sooooo long! Didn’t get to finish the game because something unfortunate happened halfway. Oh wells, even though the night ended up a small hiccup, I have to say that I enjoyed myself! So sweet of Serene to plan it for us you know. I like her so much, one of the kindest girl I’ve ever known and she’s always so readily to care for others. Yayy my samurai! =DD!

26th and 28th: Went swimming with Cjam and Ying! Hahaha Cjam’s entire family are Safra members so we went to HomeTeamNS opposite Swiss for a swim. As expected, going there = see our students. We were sitting at the coffeeshop nearby to have our lunch and saw Malvin and ZhenMing walking past so we had a short chat. They left but after 10mins or so, you can see half the class flooding over and surrounding our table. Made me so stress I could hardly eat. Haha! Still, it was great to see them though. My eyecandy was one of them LOL. Ooo, they kept commenting on my hair as well. Personally I don’t think it’s of a very big difference leh. I used to have short hair for quite a while and I merely dyed it this time. Heh.

29th: That’s today! Zzomgg so scary you know. DiYang sent me and Sis to NUH for my gum surgery. First time I ever had a surgery! I was actually pretty scary even though it was a damn minor one. LOL. Was telling Sis that I’m super scared of pain so please ask the dentist to give me lots of anesthetic. Okay so the surgery was to cut away a small part of my gums to make them more even. Nothing medical about it. Solely for aesthetic purposes and to help my Sis hit her quota hahaha. Got me all jittery but up till now, when the anesthetic has subsided, I’ve yet to feel any discomfort at all. It’s either Sis totally lied to me or the painkillers prescribed are really effective. Either way I’m not complaining. No pain! YAYY!

What a long post. Hahaha going to Marina Bay Sands tomorrow and I’m so excited! Checking in at 3 but I won’t be there with Mummy ‘cause I’m still having tuition. Will check out the next day and I’m meeting Ying before going for Sports Camp briefing. My oh my, my August is so booked!

1st: Banner painting for camp
2nd – 8th: Sports Unlimited 17!
9th: Tuition (Siannnn)
10th: Mummy’s birthday!
11th: Tuition (Siannnn)
12th: My only free and available day!
13th: Marina Bay Sands again!
14th – 19th: YOG volunteering, Badminton?
20th: Go hall shopping with Ying and Cjam and XLB buffet at night!
21th – 26th: YOG volunteering, Table Tennis?
27th: JIJI day? If not I’m going Marina Bay Sands again!
28th: Class BBQ
29th: Move into Hall lo!
30th: School starts!!

So many things happening at the same time. I have to schedule tuition amidst YOG volunteering. Hall camp clashes with YOG volunteering so it’s pretty impossible for me to go. Ouh man.

Okie, right now I’m super looking forward to the camp next week. People, pray for me k. Hopefully I won’t die of exhaustion when I’m over there =)

Baba and Ying's partyy!

Okay! The long awaited Baba and Ying’s surprise partayye!!

This is a legendary moment. Hehe, this is the very first time JIJI ever had a party! Initial plan was to go to Ying’s place at Cheng Soon Garden but her Daddy said that DingEn has to study for his N’levels so we can’t go over. Oh man! All the discussion on the bus for nothing! We thought of other alternatives like chalet/ hotels but they’re all too expensive. Hehe, heng heng smarty me remembered that the rich kid Ying (and her even richer parents) have got an unused condo at Hillview and tadah! Her Daddy said yes~!

It was a surprise for them because we pak-kup-ed with Ying’s parents to get the spare keys of the condo and went over to set up everything on the 24th before meeting them on the 25th.

So! 24th June! Met up with DJJ, Turbo and YP to shop at JP! Bought the things needed, collected the Bakerzin Strawberry Shortcake, had 2 budget meals from the Ananas Café ($1.50 Chicken Rice!), carried freaking heavy items, took the train, took the bus, kan-chiong over which stop to alight at, climbed a steeper-than-CSG slope, found the place, went up the wrong block, tried the wrong unit, went down the wrong block, used our understanding of Uncle and found the right block, freaked out for a moment because there were 2 doors yet only 1 key, went in to the house, go gaga over the pretty-ness of that place, then finally… … setting up!

Before 1

Before 2

After 1

After 2

Hoho, it was a 博命演出 for DJJ and YP! We had to paste the coloured papers on the lights to create the disco effect and the ceiling isn’t very low k. Lol we didn’t have a ladder thus had to stack 2 chairs together. Seems easy but the chair is mega shaky and unreliable so we were all damn high, shouting things like “赶快拿起电话，拨打1900-112-8888，支持我们!!!” HAHAHA coming to think of it, the process was really fun! Initially we only wanted to use the blue transparent paper but somehow along the way, we took out normal construction paper, tried it against the lights, and found out that it look super duper uber mega pretty!!! Pink, orange, green, blue and many many more. Heh heh, that forms our 七彩霓虹灯!

Apart from that we used crepe paper to make the decorations that hung from light to light and also hand-made Happy Birthday banner that we refused to buy at the party shop because it was too expensive. LOL, cheapskate but handmade banner has more sincerity right! Hehe, DJJ complimented my ‘BABA & YING’ decoration too. Hehe so after much 分工合作, we managed to finish everything! From a plain living room to a disco-wannabe party venue~! Exciting ttm =DDDD!
And now, the 25th! The actual JIJI day and we met up a City Hall before walking to Marina Square for our Just Acia. I think the food there was great! Cheap and good with free flow ice-cream and drinks. Hehe, very filling as well so I think it’s a good place to go when you have a low budget. =))









After that, we walked over to Esplanade’s rooftop because they want to help fulfill my wish. HAHA, poor Fiona has never been there before! Everytime I hear people talking about going to Esplanade’s rooftop to chill, I picture them sitting on those sharp spikes hence never understood what they truly meant. Damn noob I know. Anyway, now I do know what they meant by Esplanade rooftop!



Hehe, went over to Helix as well and I think it’s a good place to go dating LOL. Well, guess it would be even better if it’s air-conditioned. =P





Ohh! HAHAHA as we were walking towards Helix, DJJ suddenly dared to go up to the couple in front of us and break them up (they were holding hands). Somehow we linked that to 年轻人and Turbo came up with 腰力好. Put them both together and we went around shouting “年轻人?! 腰力好!!” while doing a tedious lean-back-and-yo action. Retarded much and after doing it many times, I can really feel my back aching. Hahaha, no longer young!

Bus-ed towards Hillview and it was on the bus when we somehow started singing the thai version of 失恋阵线联盟 and it was mad funny because we totally digressed and used Park-Tong-Chai and Chee-Pong-Pai as substitutes to form a sentence when we don’t know what other terms to use (a.k.a 词穷). Sidetrack a bit: it took me 5 minutes to trial and error and find what is the hanyu pinyin for 穷! Okay, back to the topic. Can’t remember what were our exact words but it went something like “Later if the hill is really Park-Tong-Chai I tell you Hui Ying we sure Chee-Pong-Pai you”. Literally it doesn’t make sense but we can more or less figure out the meaning. Heh

Funniest thing to me: We were there using our thai terms to form words when suddenly, Turbo commented that somebody is listening in to our conversation and laughing at us. From the window’s reflection I can see the guy standing diagonally and his face was really epic! He heard Turbo saying that so he was trying very hard to keep his smile in but the dimple was still very much visible. I couldn’t keep my laughter in upon seeing that so I laughed out loud and it is the uncontrollable kind. Pure ownage! So he stood there with his lower body still but upper body turning more than 90 degrees to hide his face from us. Zzomgg, I nearly died from laughing too hard. LOL!

As we were approaching Hillview, we started to act. Ying is the gong gong kind and since we’ve already been there the way before, we had to make sure she alights at the right stop without making it too obvious. Crapped a lot on our way up the slope, complaining why it is so steep and how she lied about it being milder than the one at CSG and threatening to Chee-Pong-Pai her if it’s the wrong way and YP saying that she wants to pee and more complains about how long it is going to take.

Finally! We got there and still have to continue to act. Our plan was to pull the party poppers once we’re all in and it’s hard to get the party poppers out of the bag discreetly. Anyhow lied and said that all the climbing has made me thirsty so I was actively searching for my bottle but actually clenching the poppers real tight cuz I was very nervous/excited. HAHA!

One small minus point is that Baba was the last to enter. She claimed that she likes to walk at the back so when all of us pulled popper, she was still outside! LOL asked them about how they felt about this surprise and both said it was successful. Hehe so sweet of us right. =DDDDD

Showed them their birthday ‘cards’ and gave them their presents. JiJi tradition is to give cold-hard cash so Ying got her Ipod Touch fund and as for Baba, since she’s going to use the money we’re giving her for normal expenses, we bought a Guy Laroche wallet + a secret surprise that will only come in later.

Cut the cake, took many many pictures (crazy we spammed like siao), played cards, drank Choya, ate the Choya plum (wa freak it’s damn gross =.=) and suddenly, we don’t know what else to do. Hahaha, decided to go out for a walk so we went to Batok’s Mac. It’s superrrrrr far and I have no idea how come I agreed to do it in the first place. Attempted to watch World Cup but it was too crowded. Managed a catch one goal and we decided that it was time to go already. Went back to the condo, all damn shagged after so much walking, laid down and we Zhou-Mark-Thai (slept) for 1 hour.

Woke up and we went swimming! Mind you. It was 6.30 in the morning and the water was FREEZING COLD! Had to contain our shrieks as we stepped into the pool, trembling and gritting our teeth to stop it from clattering. Sad to say, the guard came over and told us to get out because the pool is only open at 7. =(

Secretly went to the baby pool instead and it was still as cold. It was only 0.5m deep so we went hopping around the small perimeter with our butt, naively thinking it can help make us warmer. Obviously it wasn’t very helpful so we got up after a while and went back to the house to have breakfast.

YP, Baba and DJJ left earlier so it was only Ying, Turbo and me at the pool later. Had a lot of fun! Hehe it was more of it ‘soaking’ session as we lazed around and chatted which I can’t remember the content already (haha I’m glad that I didn’t drown since I was pretty braindead by then =S).

Initial plan to have lunch together was cancelled because all we wanted to do at the time was to sleep. Stupid me. Left my wallet on the sofa and only realized it when I went up the bus. Had to call Ying and I feel so guilty for making her father drive back and open the door for me! Nonetheless, got my wallet back and finally, home sweet home!

Okay. Time for Baba’s secret surprise! Tried asking what she wanted for her birthday and she actually said “Surprise”. Oi, that’s a hard thing to achieve k! It took us quite a while to decide on a wallet but we need to do sometime with the leftover. Here comes the amazing thing. DJJ liaised with Alina (Baba’s legendary sister)!!! She was REALLY helpful and it was only through her we knew that Baba wanted this SNSD poster and it was also her who ordered it for us!

So, the poster only came in a few days ago so Alina sent a text to DJJ which goes like this:

“Heyhey! Alicia has received the poster and she looks shocked. There’s a few things that I thought that I’d let u know:
1) she doesn’t know who gave it to her even though the recipient is Alicia (Baba)
2) she suspects huiying/ me though
3) she suspects that we collaborated but I told her it’s not possible
4) she though of not asking you guys and wait for the sender to won up cos she reckons that the sender will be worried if the mail got thru.
So, being not able to see the hint, I leave it to you how you wanna let her know?”

Smarty DJJ forwarded this to us so we can all think of a solution and GUESS WHAT!!! She sent as a group (JIJI), and BABA WAS INCLUDED IN THE LIST!!!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAA OWNAGE TTM! Moreover, she didn’t realize it herself. It was Baba who replied her, saying “You even smsed me. I don’t know what you should do too.” I only have two words to describe DJJ. TIO OWNED!!

The whole series of messages that came after this was so mega bloody funny till I really laughed out loud. Usually I’ll just smile like a retard when I’m reading messages but this time… I was there struggling to read the content off my phone screen (which is very small btw) because I was shaking all over for laughing too much. LOL, easily made my day!

Hehe, that’s all for Baba and Ying’s birthday celebration! Mission success! =DDDD!!

I want to stab myself =(

Went for NTU's medical check-up and I'm so friggin heavy (yes and fat) right now.
Knocked my heard against the metal handle while showering.
That's like the second time I'm injuring my head in a week.
I'm already stupid enough so it's really important to keep those cells alive.
Moreover, it hurts a lot.
I forgot to exempt myself from an Econs module.
That means I have to waste my time going for the lectures.
And my future coursemates probably wouldn't turn up cause who won't exempt I ask you.
I actually missed the deadline by 1 hour and 17 minutes.
I don't understand why I procrastinate and not do it 16 days ago when I learnt about it.
I scrubbed a little too hard while showering just now and my limbs are like burning now.
I'm home alone on a Friday night and I'm hungry.
Went for a haircut today and my hair is so short right now.
Well, it is shorter at least.
Wanted to go for a swim but it rained.
Dental was painful and I have a gum surgery the following week.
Went for a run just now and I'm so super unfit right now.
I'm pretty determined to lose weight but more determined in not getting started.
I'm addicted to popcorn and that's not helping at all.
My bio clock is so screwed I can't sleep before 2AM each day.
I want to go swimming so badly but the pool is so far away.
Okay actually I just want to say how pissed I am with myself for missing the deadline.
The rest is just all crap.
But it did happen so let's just put it in.
Now it's time for random things I've done.

Met up with DJJ last night for Despicable Me.
I feel that those yellow things are real adorable.
Some say they look like potatoes while others say capsule.
I think they look like I-don't-know-I've-never-seen-them-before.

Met up with Kegan on Tuesday and we went to this Latin dance club.
He's psycho-ing me to take up ballroom dancing and I'm think it's fun too.
Hell but no way I'm going to travel to Tanjong Pagar.
Besides, that was the first time ever I alighted at T.Pagar.
I never knew what's that place for.

My uncle passed away last week.
It was pancreatic cancer, terminal stage.
Nobody (including himself) knew that he was ill.
It was very sudden, and within like 2 weeks or so, he moved on.
I'm not exactly very close to him, but yea, Uncle Tan Tee, I'll miss you.

August seems to be a very busy month for me.
YOG briefing on the 1st.
Will be having a camp from 2nd-8th.
NDP on the 9th.
Mummy's birthday on the 10th.
YOG volunteering from 14th-26th.
JIJI outing on the 27th?
Class gathering on the 28th.
Move into hostel on the 29th.
School starting on the 30th.
Niceeeee. I'm only free for 3 days in the entire month. Shall save it for 'me' time!

Okay this is a very relaxed way of blogging.
I'm so tired and bored at the same time.
I've not inserted any pictures into my JIJI day draft.
I think it's time for me to sleep.
There's Esprico dinner tomorrow and it has been so super duper long since I had a proper meetup with any one of them (apart from Kegan).
Looking forward to it now.
Hell but I think I'll be late.
Not on purpose, but peak-hour traffic is not something that can be messed with.

This reminds me.
I only found out today that there's a train connecting red line to the green line directly.
I was at CCK, looking the electronic board thinking how come it states Pasir Ris.
Took the train anyway, and found out that I need not alight at JE to make a transfer!
That blown me off like totally.
I was so amazed by it.
But somehow it seems like a lot of people knew about it already.
Really meh?
How come I never see before one.

What a post.
I like being random
Lalala, and I don't like strawberries.
And Kiwi too.
And passionfruit too.
And papaya too.
Strawberries are the worst.
I think that look hideous.
They make me sick.
I don't like lotus roots as well.
Owww thinking about it is enough to make me puke.

Goodnight.

Meeting with the Werewolves!

DJJ I KNOW! HAHAHAHA, very fast I tell you. I got the party's post out already but yet to put in pictures only. Veh fast veh fast!

Hehe! Love meeting up with friends! Yeeharr!

Met up with Elaine, Kegan, HuaHui, XueLi, Ying and Steven last last Wednesday. A weird combination we had but it was all cool. Hehe, had Swensons for dinner followed by Horlicks McFlurry as deserts. Hohoho, I think Horlicks McFlurry is damn good! First time I’m eating it and I think it’s really nice. Hehe! Sad to say, I don’t think it’s available anymore? =(

Met up with the Werewolves yesterday! Hahaha I’m still not very used to that name. Anyway, Mel, CaiLing, Benjamin (so cool first time I saw him (properly)!), Joanne, SinHua, AhChua and I went to Decoder’s instead of our initial plan of USS. Ouh man, I was very much looking forward to USS! Dear Mel, when you see this, it means that I’m dropping you a mega big hint. HAHAHA, we have to go USS someday!

Anyway it was all board games at Decoders. There’s this wanna-topple-but-don’t-topple thing, Cluedo, Gold Digger and finally, Werewolf + Expansion. Hehe, seems that it’s still our favourite. Been so long since I’ve last played that game and I actually do miss it a lot! Lol at the beginning I was still a little confused as for what is the role of each character. =P

Went over to Central for our Manhatten dinner. JunRong and his girlfriend (so cool first time I saw her too!) joined us while CaiLing and Benjamin went off to have Jumbo instead (LOL people good life you know!) Anyway, gosh I was starving! Didn’t have breakfast nor lunch and the people there took so long to serve me my rice. Hehe I love their rice! Was secretly smiling to myself as I was eating. So 幸福!

Troubled over where to go after dinner so JunRong suggested TCC. Went all the way to the opposite side only to find out that there aren’t enough seats thus had to think of where to go again and I must say we are all very indecisive. HAHA, this is super random, but somehow some time during the discussion, I could feel my shorts falling off! Okay it’s usally pretty loose but not to the extent of dropping yet this time, it was already halfway down my butt. Checked a little and guess what? It was unbuttoned and the zip was halfway down! Ownage. Don’t even know how that happened. Hurriedly asked Joanne to be my cover as I stood behind her and ‘settle’ my problem. Hahaha! Okay this is really random.

So! Final decision was to go over to Vivo and lepak at their rooftop. Decided to stay indoors (hehe got aircon!) and as expected, dear CaiLing is our poker cards provider and we sat in a circle to play Werewolf again. Time passed really fast so we left to catch the train and go over to CaiLing’s place for a stayover!

Stayed in the room to HTHT with Joanne and CaiLing while Mel, Benjamin and AhChua were outside watching the match between Germany and Uruguay. Hehe, we talked about a lot of things! Fiona loves to HTHT I tell you. So long as you’re willing to listen, I will be super willing to talk. LOL! The match-gang joined after when the game was over and it became a Truth session. We directed questions to one another and personally I think it’s a good way to understand each other better. Hehe, quality time spent! =DDD!

Oh yar. HAHAHAHHA, this is damn mean but it is really funny to see CaiLing freaking out over a moth! I always thought that they were harmless so I don’t understand what’s so scary about them. Poor CaiLing. She hopped off the bed then onto the bed then off the bed again then onto the bed again. All along she had a blanket over her head so by the time it was all over, her hair was in a total mess. LOL!

Pretty soon it was already morning so we went down to Macs for breakfast. Bus-ed home, open the door to find out that DiYang was here, went over to Mummy’s room only to find it locked. Zzomgg, I was so shagged by then and I don’t have a bed to sleep in! Hehe, good thing Daddy was up early go play golf so I managed to take over his bed. =))

Oooh! I just remembered too. When I was showering before crashing onto Daddy’s bed, I found this small bump at the back of my head! Stupid me. I knocked into a sharp corner of CaiLing’s shelf when I was over there and it friggin hurts! Moments after knocking into it I really felt faint and this urge to vomit. =((( It’s so painful =(((

Hehe! Overall I’m so happy to meet up with those familiar faces. Even though the guys are forever talking about NS and being in their own world, it’s still great to see them all again. It seems pretty weird huh. Guys are constantly complaining about NS but when they come out, they can never stop talking about it! Tsktsk, why keep going back to the topic that makes you unhappy? –shakes head-

So so so so satisfied

Okay I ought to be blogging about Baba & Ying's party but I can already foresee that it's gonna be damn long and what I want to say now can't wait. Hehe

I want to say how thankful I am for the life I'm leading now.

Family
Daddy is our sole breadwinner, and I must really say that he has done a fantastic job at that. We never had trouble over our finances. We are not extremely well-to-do but at least we're not starving. Daddy, despite being demanding at times (haha) is very concerned over my moral values. Every now and then he'll tell me 做人的道理 which I must say even though I find him naggy at times, it is a real good form of character development for me. Of course, I'm not a saint and definitely not the best daughter/person around but hey, at least I think I'm decent. LOL

Mummy! She is the person I'll 撒娇 to the most. She pampers me to the max. HAHAHA, sometimes to the extent I feel that I'm a spoilt princess once I'm at home. When I go over to her room to sleep, she'll let me take the bed whereas she'll take the mattress. When I'm too lazy to move, she'll go over to the kitchen and serve me the dinner she has already prepared. Sometimes when I'm even more lazy, she'll feed me. LOL! Okay the more I say the more it seems that I'm super unfilial. It's not okay. It's just our way of bonding. I like to lie on top of her and whisper into her ears, she likes to molest me and snuggle close to me. -kiss kiss!-

Jiejie! LOL I'm forever saying that she's a bully. Whenever DiYang comes over, I'll lose my bed. Have to pack up my things and go knock on Mummy's door, asking her to let me sleep in her room. Now, her friend MeiHui likes to come over too. Oh no, double the frequency of me being 'kicked' away. But, she's really helpful! Upon knowing that I got into NTU Accountancy, she's even more excited for me. Before I even got home, she already succeeded in persuading Daddy to let me stay in the hall. When application for camps and all started to come in, she used her connections to make sure I can get in. I think one major factor why my parents give me so much freedom is because I have such an outstanding sister like her. She has proven that playing hard can also yield good results so my parents hardly interfere with what she's doing. Because of her paving the road in front, things were so much easier when it was my turn. =)

Gorgor! He is a young child at heart. Last night, he came back home with one big box and it's actually Band Hero! He's always the one bringing entertainment to me. He loves computer games and you can always see him sitting in front of the computer clicking away. Being the big brother, I remember hiding behind him when I was very young. He'll stick out his index finger and my tiny hand would just wrap around it as he leads the way. Hehehe so cute rightttt. Hahaha we don't do it anymore (obviously) but he's still protecting me. When the both of us get scolded, he'll take the blame for me and with that sweet tongue of his, he can always wriggle his way out of trouble. =DD

Friends
JIJI. Hahahaha Cute albeit retarded name we have. I love them lots! They say that secondary school is the place where you'll meet life-long friends and I don't doubt that at all. We only started coming together in Sec4, and the way Jiji was formed was actually pretty dumb. However, we've made it so far! I remember being very reluctant to graduate from Swiss because I don't want to lose my friends. I was actually pretty worried that we'll just 解散 this way. Initially, the 6 of us agreed to go to PJC together. As time passed, Turbo and YP decided to go SP, and Ying decided to go SA. I must say that I was pretty affected. I remember standing in the rain with DJJ, getting all emo as we thought of how Jiji will drift apart. I remember sitting at the playground with Kegan, as I broke down while telling him how afraid I was to lose them. Awwww, I'm getting a little teary as I'm typing this. Nonetheless, the latest Jiji gathering a.k.a Baba & Ying's birthday party was a blast! As we go through another phase in life now, I'm less paranoid and have plenty of faith in our friendship. =)

Student Council. In my JC years, I made the most number of friends through council. Even though some/most people don't like council, I have to say that it made a very very big impact on me. Back at Swiss, my CCA grade was E8. Minimal participation in school activities and unlike the others, I don't have to stay back on Tuesdays and Fridays. Held no positions and no leadership qualities in me. When I got into PJ council, I was given the opportunity to do things that I never thought I could. It wasn't like I was very outstanding or like I did a lot, but it was enough for me. Standing on the stage, addressing the entire J1 cohort, struggling to stay hyper despite being damn shagged out after dancing for 6 (or was it 9?) hours non-stop. Went for LTC and OBS as well and I will always remember. A leader creates what he/she creates.

I made friends like Steven, Kegan, Elaine, XueLi, Ernest, Jay, WeiCong, XiMing, HuiMin, Serene (well, I got to know her better haha), RuiYong, Leonard, WeeLing. For the first 4, I'm meeting them up regularly and they are really very sweet people. Hanging out with Steven is always fun because he is forever doing funny and stupid things. Also, he'll share with me his army stories, and I must say I got all my army knowlege from him LOL. Kegan is the htht friend. Somehow when I am in front of him, it is easier to share what I have on mind and he's also able to make me feel better. He's frank, and more importantly, he showers sincere compliments HEHE. Elaine is very active in asking me to meet up with her! Hahaha she'll always send a text over and we'll go out to have a dinner together. She's a gossip queen for sure. LOL once we see each other we'll definitely share the latest gossip and bitch about those people involved HAHA. Xueli ah, tsktsk! She's my sweetiest pie. Okay we're not exactly meeting up regularly but we met up recently! Hehe, she's very concerned over my love life (and I know you're reading this space!) but sad to say, no hong hong lie lie nor potential ones for me. =(

08S27! Okay, I've never told them this but I was actually very grateful to them. Hahaha, classmates like Melissa, Joanne, CaiLing, Eddie, KaiYao, JunRong, Lex, SinHua (uh oh I nearly forgot about him o.o). In J1, I was pretty occupied by council and it was only after I stepped down when I became closer to the class. In the past I was only close to Mel but after council was over, I managed to know a lot of them better. Mel is our solid pom pi pi gathering organizer. Seldom do we have a full-strength gathering but actually, seeing a few familiar faces every now and then makes me very happy. I try my best to attend our 'Werewolves' gathering so as to see my cute classmates again. I miss playing Werewolf and Twister! =DDDD! In the later part of the year, I got closer to WanFong and YangLin. WanFong was my singing buddy. We'll sit together at the back of the class, singing softly while playing our songs game. Well, that kinda explains why we're always not listening in class. It's hard to keep thinking of songs! YangLin claims to be my BFF but creditability questioned. Hahaha he has a fetish over my hairtie and our study sessions were forever unproductive. However, I must say that he's not really that childish lah. Sometimes (surprisingly), the advice he gives is pretty useful and I secretly go "woah" by his maturity of thoughts. Of course, it's best not to praise him cuz his ego will shoot sky high =.=

Eric and ZR. When we were young, the 3 of us were hanging out on a weekly basis. We'll head over to gran's, go buy bubble tea, go cycling, play catching, play crocodile, play blindmice, play basketball and have stayovers. As we grew older, we moved on to Kungfu Chaos and going to the movies. As for now, we hardly go back to gran's! Okay I'm meeting Eric and ZR rather frequently but it's always either me+Eric for me+ZR. We don't hang out together anymore =((. HAHA but no worries lah, after 18 years of seeing each other oh-so-often, we don't even feel awkward when we meet up suddenly. Like today, watch Eclipse with ZR (can't believe I actually watched it but yea, I did) followed by Joy's performance at the Esplanade. Been quite a while since we went out for our 'date' but I'm still very happy to see him! When we were in the theatre, told him jokingly that I'm afraid of the dark and he reflectively took my arm and linked it around his. So sweet right. LOL but I'm also very good to him k. Instead of taking 960, I actually accompanied him throughout the mega long Citylink that I hate so much so that he can take the train back. Hehe =)

Anyway what inspired this post was that I've been feeling so contented for the past few weeks. The entire June was spent in happiness. In fact, I got a shock my sleep was disrupted by the 12pm bell that rings on the first day of each month. It then occurred to me that July is here! Oh my god that's reallllllly fast. I went for 2 overseas trips and met up with so many people. It has really been a great time for me. I want to be thankful for what I have.

Actually, this makes me kinda paranoid. I'm a noob when it comes to setbacks and obstacles. I tend to be pessimistic before something happens (like I'll think about all the worst-case scenarios and get myself all worried) yet optimistic when something did happen (like I'll think "well, maybe it's not that bad after all" and start thinking of what to do). I'm worried that I'll run out such 'good luck' and something bad (choy choy choy) will happen soon. Sounds pathetic but please don't let that happen. I'm not experienced when it comes to difficulties in life. It makes me sad and I'll often not know what to do. =((

Adam Lambert!

I told myself that I'll update this place regularly but sometimes I'm really just L A Z Y. =(

Anyway, I'm still waiting for Ying to upload the photos of her birthday party onto facebook because I want to blog about it so bad. As for now, I want to say how much I love Adam Lambert! =DDDD!!

Oh no, it's cropped. Anw, one of my faves!

Despite all the controversy going on, I still think that he's really hot. Amazing performer! Who cares if he's gay or not. What I like about him is his really powerful vocals. Even tone-deaf people like me knows he's great so he must be really really good!

Anyway, sidetrack a bit. I think it's alright to be homosexual. I have friends around me that are inclined towards the same gender but that doesn't affect me a single bit. Don't tell me it's wrong. All of us have the rights to pursue after our definition of happiness. Apart from the fact that the couple can't reproduce, I don't see what's stopping 2 men/women from getting together.

As for those people who can't stand homosexuals, my advice to you is to keep your comments to yourself. Seriously, it's no big deal. It's like drugs. If you don't like it, just stay away. Nobody is forcing you to take it anyway. Oh, this is a bad example. Here's another one. It's like eating ginger. Personally I hate the taste of ginger but obviously, I don't go around boycotting people who eat them. It's the same idea!

Okay, no need for me to get all worked up. Hehe, back to fawesome Adam Lambert!! Started noticing him only because of Time for Miracles. Seldom do I watch American Idol so it took me a while to even realize he had been there. Then came along his debut album and the entire For Your Entertainment album was great. Okay maybe apart from Broken Open and Soaked but the rest blown me off totally.

Oh. This has nothing to do with Adam Lambert but I want to say how much I crave for cheese and caramel popcorn now. Also, after going to Bintan I'm now in love with Apple juice with aloe vera. Plusplusplus, after Ying+Baba's party, I'm in love with swimming. Constantly bugging mummy, asking her to bring me there. Hehe!